July 25, 2011

Examination in Kathmandu University

     "My heart is pounding 'dhuk dhuk dhuk dhuk...', is it because exam is on the next step?" posted one of my friends in KU in his facebook profile. Well, I commented, "Yours was just 'dhuk dhuk dhuk dhuk...'; my breath had stopped when I saw the question paper, thank God, my heart was pounding." 
Not a big topic of discussion.. actually nothing important but still you might have guessed that the questions were unexpected. I am not guilty to say, "The questions which I had ignored as non-important were all I saw in the question paper." May be, some of you had a good time with those questions; it was my bad luck, perhaps.
So what? Does that give an overview of examination in KU?", asked someone
(this someone always interferes me from the inside- from the core of my heart :) and makes me do things wrong, this way or that). Of course the above paragraph gives an idea about the exam pattern. Questions are pretty unpredictable and courses in Kathmandu University is quite hard to go through (may be because they change the syllabus time and again). No no! Not that hard actually; I meant you need to labour hard to get grades. 
They give you A, A-, B+, B, B-, C+, C, C-, D and F grades in results. (I am confused about D+ and D- as I suppose they must not exist!). They give you a GPA sheet with your final marks. GPA (Grade Point Average) was what I never cared about; but "it's a horrible fact that you must have scored more than 3.2 GPA to get scholarship or Master's Degree in good university in the foreign", informs me one of my very few friends. I must believe him simply because he deserves to be believed; his words always have a power! I have started caring about it a little though!
You should not proceed below this line if you really care about your GPA; wasting five more minutes will reduce your time for preparing a 3 marks short question! See you later! Please close this tab (or the browser if you have not opened facebook in next tab)!
Still reading? Well, I had spent more than half an hour of my valuable time writing all this; afterall it's for evergreen readers (readers who can read every piece of nonsense with full interest) like you! Okay, let me quickly list down very few interesting rules of examination here in KU. Let me first list them quickly from the back side of an admission card I got for the end semester examination.
  • It was the first day yesterday so the exam hall had opened 20 minutes before 11:00 in the morning. They say it will open at sharp 10:50 from now onwards! My watch was 5 minutes late than theirs. I saw all my friends around the Block #6 and approached there; found my roll number allocated at Room #203. Hurriedly I reached there to find that it was the Physics Practical Lab! Where was I supposed to stay for exam? I went back to the main gate, looked the seat plan once again- to see that I was supposed to be in block #8. I did a 100m quick race to the Room #203 of Mechanical Engineering Block (#7). I reached there, and I was not more than 15 minutes late after the exam had started; I was let in. Else I should have fiired an application to someone whom I don't know- or- instead I would try to melt the heart of invigilator for the room (Hopefully there was a kind hearted man there, but he will be replaced by someone else next day!)
  • "A seat marked with roll number of each candidate will NOT be allocated. Candidates will require to find and occupy their seats according to the roll number list pasted outside the room!" Very funny that this line without 'NOT' is printed clearly (Times New Roman 12 Regular Justified) on the back side of each admission card!
  • "While entering the examination hall candidaes will be permitted to carry only the following items:" This list includes pen, pencil, eraser, inkpot, calculator and 'etc'. Let me make you clear about that 'etc'. It includes: geometry box (includes everything), your bag(you need to keep it on the floor in front of the examination hall), your cell phone and ipod (you are supposed to switch off it and keep in your bag), good luck #### (do not place it on the desk, they are likely to take it away), and so on!
  • You are not a student of kinder garten! You are student of Kathmandu University, and you are not a 'underdeveloped' version of our ancestors. So, why would you tear out a leaf from the answer book? Of course you will write on both sides of the answer book; who wants to leave a blank page in there? Do you? Okay then, it is for you. 'Do not write on the back side of the front page and write on both sides of the other pages... very funny that you are reading this!'
  • Will you fire a cigar inside the examination hall?
  • Will you not hand over the answer sheet when the final bell rings (time is over)? Well, unless you are solving one of the easiest topics and you are in the middle of it the inviligator will have to bother coming to you and snatch the answer sheet.
Here is a list of crimes that you are not supposed to commit during the examination. Remember that you will be rejected for giving any examination in Kathmandu University for up to 5 years if you are an exam-criminal. It's obvious that they will cancel your current examination and call for an 'interview'. Do you want to add a 'Exam-criminal at KU) tag beside your name? Commit any of these crimes, and you will promptly get one! Don't worry, it's absolutely free!
  1. Talk loudly with your seat partner or your classmate (usually you will find one to talk with right in front or behind your seat; they place students of same department in a row) or someone outside the examination hall, loud enough that the inviligator hears you talking. If he/she is an angry bird, you will get a tag!
  2. Leave the examination hall without handing over your answer sheet to the inviligator or dispose or take away your answer sheet with you. [Sure Shot Hit to Get a Tag].
  3. Write a question or answer to any question on a piece of paper and show it to the inviligator.
  4. Scold your friend using a abusive or ovscene language- %@$&*. Hmm.. better you scold the inviligator, for a better chance.
  5. Write your name, email address and phone number on the answer sheet or mark something that looks like something sketched to inform the examiner.
  6. Write something like, "Dear Sir/Madam, I was sick during the examination so I could not prepare for the exam; please give me pass marks so that I could do better in future examinations. Please please.. keep me in place of your daughter!" on the answer sheet.
  7. Take a note or a photocopy of book (make sure that it includes solution of at least one question in the question paper, else you will not be considered guilty) with you and show it to the inviligator in the middle of the exam hours.
  8. Pretend like you had a nice cheat with yourself and make this noticeable to the inviligator. While he/she approaches you, conceal it, destroy, disfigure, erase out, shallow or run away with it away from the class or show a magic by hiding it. Well, you can just attempt to do so (you need not shallow a piece of paper, just chew it and ..).
  9. Pass your question paper to your classmate.
  10. Stand up, bend towards your classmate and start copying from his/her answer book until your paper is snatched. Better you move a little towards the side and whisper to your friend, "Look at my answer sheet, what I've done with it!". I bet that they will kick you out of the class for showing your answers.
If you tried these things and still you did not get a 'Criminal' tag, you should run to the Library and find a computer, place your lucky *** on it and type in 'google.com'. Enter the keyword 'exam criminal Kathmandu University' and click on 'I am feeling lucky'. If you saw this blog, then I bet I am lucky enough to have readers like you! Good Luck!
Enough is enough! I have wasted one hour writing all this for you and you have spend 15 minutes reading this for me. Lets depart for now. Good luck with your examinations!

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